Saturday, May 4, 2013

God Gives the Growth

"I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth."
--1 Cor 3:6

This verse is really all that can drive my work on this blog.  I see no fruits of my labor: a few views here and there, mostly from image searches (which is strange, considering that almost no images have ever originated from me).  I have no stories of people affected by my posts, whether conversions or renewals of faith.  I plant, I sow seeds, I water...yet I can cause nothing.  All of the many, many hours that have gone into this blog feel wasted.  It seems like I am a failure as a Christian: I have not seen conversions happen from my efforts, I have not seen renewals of faith.  I do not go out an speak to random people on the streets like extroverts do: my best work is done inside, alone.  My God-given gifts are more book-based, yet they seem like God-rejected gifts, for they seem to do nothing.  All of my work feels like it's for naught.

Yet I continue to work.  Why?  Is it for some sick sense of masochism, that I like seeing all of my hours wasted on work that I know to be fruitless?  No: it is because I trust in God.

"God gave the growth."  That is what keeps me going.  I believe God wants me to do this kind of work.  Why?  Is it because He wants to make me feel worthless?  No:  it is because He has some plan.  If He wants me to do this work, He can use it for some good.  Even if I never see the good that results, it is still good that I do it.  It is not for a reward that we should strive for the Good: it is for the Good Itself, that is, for God.  I do this work because God wishes me to, and He can use it for good.  Even if I never see a single result of this blog, I will continue it as long as I think God wishes me to, for I believe He can do work through it though I am unaware of it.  I am the mere planter: I merely water: it is God Who gives the growth.  I do the work on earth, yet God does the true work, for He touches men's hearts.  Though I feel weary of fruitless labor, I will continue, for I believe God brings fruit, though it is hidden from my sight.

"I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth."

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